The supreme being addresses the nation...

During our first week on holiday in Torridon the supreme being decided she would like to record her first message to the nation. She wished you all to know what a lovely holiday she was having and give you an insight into her world and her everyday adventures.

I hope you enjoy her first oratory appearance and appreciate the finer points of her address to you all. It's possibly not the most intelligible thing you will ever have heard, but like all great leaders, I fancy she wished to leave something for the imagination - either that or she had been pilfering Daddy's beer again.

Video: The supreme being's first address